Autocorrect Fail

Hello all from the same position I have not moved from in like two hours,

My friend Sarah and I were having an in depth conversation via text message earlier. I say in depth because it was literally more lengthy than usual because of the autocorrect feature on our phones. I feel like the super geniuses at Apple hit a goldmine when they came up with autocorrect. Then I think about how I hate when autocorrect changes my s word to shot. You dumb shot you!

As a matter of fact, Sarah just tweeted something that was supposed to say psycho but autocorrect saw fit to change it to psychology. No insult can bring you to your knees faster than being called a psychology.

I have a very short story that I would like to tell tonight. It is the worst, yet most hilarious, autocorrect that has ever happened to me.

It was late at night and I had to get up to work the next morning. I was scheduled to be there at seven. If you know me, you know my mornings start around noon every day so I was conflicted. I knew I would make good money because I would be the only waitress on the floor, but I was really not looking forward to carrying heavy trays of pancakes and bacon that early. So, I did what I do about everything. I posted a Facebook status about my inner conflict. It read, "Going to bed early for work. Morning shifts are a love hate." Or so I thought.

When I woke up the next morning, I went through my normal motions. I laid in bed for "just five more minutes," brushed my teeth, pulled my hair back into my trademark curly ponytail, and put some mascara and lipstick on so I didn't frighten the customers away. And of course, I checked my phone. I had like fifteen FB notifications. I was feeling pretty popular until I saw what it was for. Everyone had liked and commented on my status I posted the previous evening. Except, the status did not say what I had meant to say. It read, "Going to bed early for work. Morning SHITS are a love hate." Oh. My. God. I have never laughed so hard in my life. My sides were hurting and I had tears rolling down my chin! It was seven in the morning, my body was totally not prepared for that kind of excitement. Cameron Kirkland had commented on it and Destiny told me later that he laughed all day at work about it. Oh, I am so glad other people got a kick out of my mistake.

Thank you autocorrect, you mother ducker!